What Have We Here?

My thoughts just meandered their way here...

Fin.

4 more days...


Its 4 days till i leave for KL.

For a break between the tuition-ing.

Thank God.

Speaking of tuition, i received my payment on thursday and proceeded to put the money into the bank account.

And that particular night, the depositing machine decided to swallow up my money. The machine read: Transaction Error. Your money has been kept in the machine for safety purposes.

Bah.

Yes. And i had to call the bank to find out where my money went.

The customer service officer told me that this unfortunate incident that i had placed myself in was to be put in investigation.

But all is well now.

I got an sms frm the bank saying that they credited the money back into my account already. Thank God.

So? Shall i splurge on that pretty tan brown leather bag i saw at Ink at J8?

Decisions, decisions hehe.

The past week has actually been rather kind.

With the exception of the unfortunate incident with the depositing machine on thursday that is.

I bumped into Qhuzaimah at CausewayPoint on wednesday and she invited me to join her and seri for dinner at Pizza Hut! It was a special treat from her. :D

Thank You Zaimah!

Then yesterday, i had an impromptu dinner with zak, azimah and hafiz.

We even played some games.

That was the icing on the cake.

From "The first thing that i'm thinking of" to Fuzzy Wuzzy and BangBang.

I had no doubt that we were the loudest lot of people at TehTarik last night.

I can't wait for our 1st September date!

You guys always make me smile.

That's why people say that "Old is Gold"

One of the few people that know how to really make me laugh and unwind.

Thanks guys.


The tears have subsided, finally.

But im sure that it was just PMS and not me.


Fin.

Happy 42nd Birthday!


I miss you guys!

U know who you are! :D

I think its all the reminiscing of all the National Day's that i've missed over the past 3 years.

I still remember the Home Away From Home program we had during my time as EXCO.

That gorgeous cake. :D

Suli, stay tough okay? If i can go through a lot of heartache and pain the last sem, im pretty confident that u can make it through with flying colours too.

Take a look at this site. I'm somewhere in the front row.

On another note, I love my AI peeps too!

You guys still rock my socks lah!

Thanks Sree for sending me all the way back to my block, i was absolutely touched!

It still goes to show that there are still nice guys around.

And also to my dear Aisyah Spec, CONGRATS! I'm so happy for u!


Salam manis to all my friends at KL...another 2 weeks to go till i see u all.


Fin.

Pitstopp-ed

I 've not blogged so long that i might have forgotten how to.

The point is,

I'm just too lazy to switch on the laptop OR i simply haven't got the energy to blog.

But then today is a special day.

Its special cos i met up with the babes (and one guy) haha.

We went to Pitstop cafe and had the BESTest time EVER.

Trust me when i say that it was the bestest time ever.

I laffed till tears streamed out of my eyes and even my head throbbed after laffing SO MUCH.

Our source of entertainment,

mindless card games that had us screaming like banshees and fingers that got hurt by pressing a bell.

And i spilled my drink.

That's how rowdy it got.

We played SmartAss (and i mean that quite literally), Ugly Dollie (or was it doll), some counting game where we had to match the same fruits till the number 5 and some sound making game.

Oh. my. God.

It was so hilarious!

I can't believe how much fun we had!

Azimah was really really funny.

Whenever i keep replaying that scene in my head i just want to burst out laffing.

I wished that we had actually recorded the whole session.

*grinning like an insane idiot*

Mindless games i like.

We've already planned to make another outing to Pitstop soon. InsyaAllah.

To all my UIA frens, lets go when u're having your mid-term break.

You will definitely enjoy the atmosphere!

To my girls (and Hafiz): I loved the time we spent together! Thank God for friends like you! It really makes my day and sends all the dark clouds away.

Initially earlier this week, i was feeling really depressed and i was crying till i fell asleep.

Feelings of worthlessness and unworthiness seemed to just creep back into me.

Thankfully, the clouds have lifted.

Thank you to ALL my friends.

Thanks Nora kerana melayankan i last night! :D I miss our late night chats and gossip!

I hope next wednesday will materialise, cos i really would love to meet the AI crew, Devilic Angels and the rest.

7 years on and im already reminiscing.

Belum lagi 10 tahun grad dari sec sch.

Anyway, i should go to bed now.

Diana's wedding tomorrow...

That's gonna be another AI reunion in itself.

Not bad for a more-than-a-week-long hiatus.

Till then.


Fin.

Whoever YOU are...


I know your heart was in the the right place but it didn't have to go so far as to leave him a comment or a message.

Especially on Friendster.

It was chivalrous but it kinda backfired.

Cos right now, im at the receiving end.


And YOU who have been so unkind in words, if YOU were so unhappy with what was said,

couldn't YOU have msged him YOURSELF and settle with him.

Why make me out to be the culprit?

Sorry, i forgot. You don't know how to work Friendster.

My bad.


Fin.

Mirror mirror on the Wall.


It has been a very LONG and trying week.

Least of all the trip that i took to KL.

I made it in one piece, although i was worried about my safety.

But alhamdullillah i reached UIA close to 6.30pm on wednesday and even managed to hit the pasar malam once more.

I went boggle eyed at all the DVDs.

I bought Transformers, License to Wed, Ocean's 13, 300, and of course Fantastic Four.

I didn't even wait to get home to watch the dvds.

The moment i settled into Suli's room, we flipped open her swanky laptop and watched License to Wed together with Za.

The clearance went very smoothly. Very unexpected. but im glad that it was over quickly.

Thanks to all my mates especially Suli and Dayah for putting me up in your rooms. Much appreciated.

At this point i can't wait to convo!

I mean it is the highlight of the whole journey of receiving your degree.

Wearing the gown...*unfortunately UIA has got not mortarboard. im kinda bummed*

I'm having a rush akin to a sugar high just by talking about it. :D

Anyway, im not bummed out about the whole issue that got me down the whole of last weekend.

I'm over it.

I mean if he's ready to move on then so be it.

If it really makes him happy, then i'll just be glad for him. *even if it kills me to say it*

Well then, whats with the title to today's post?

It's got to do with the mirror in my bathroom.

One of the clips decided to give way after 10 years of dutiful service.

So now, there isn't a mirror in the bathroom.

Which really strikes me as weird.

All you see on the wall is the wall behind which the mirror used to be placed.

I mean a bathroom MUST have a mirror!

Okay i can see some pple trying to make sense of what i just typed above. Haha.

Anyway, i would like to wish a certain Netty Ryanie Kamaruzaman, Selamat Pengantin Baru!You look gorgeous (as always!)

It was great being there at your wedding. The decor was great and the food was MARVELLOUS *even though i didn't get to try them all. but just looking at it already made my mouth water.*

It was nice to see a lot of old faces.

The ones from secondary school.

I never thought that we'd all grow up.

It seems only like yesterday that we were in school, attending the classes and sitting for the exams.

And one by one you're all getting married.

Its like one BIG wake up call after another.

In two weeks time Diana is getting married. And in October, Eliza.

Geez...korang semua pakat ke nak kawen tahun ni? Hehe

Like i said to Huda earlier today, i like that warm fuzzy feeling in my tummy.

Weddings I like!

In 2 weeks time, the 3 musketeers unite! Thank God.

For a moment it felt a bit weird NOT having Rock around.

Anyhow, its time for bed and im pooped!


Fin.

This Sux.

I've been moping the past few days.

I don't know why.

Maybe its the PMS coupled with the SURPRISE that i found out on saturday.

I've been extremely moody and grumpy.

I guess the trip to KL tomorrow is coming at an apt time.

In the mean time, i'm mulling over tomorrow's interview...

*what to wear? what to say?*

Fin.

The Ego Takes A Bruise.


I've been replaced.


And it HURTS like hell.


Help...


Fin.

Procrastinate(-ion)


Since i've started to tutor, ive been pretty LAAAAZZZYYYYY.

But pls dun get me wrong hor.

I've done nothing other than housework.

And that itself just saps SO much energy.


-im starting to sound very much like a desperate housewife-


hey but everything's good. alhamdullillah.

my name is officially on the graduates list! *yeay-ness*

and i'll probably be heading over to KL next week to do my clearance.

plus i'll have my babe Azimah with me.

*Wheeeeeeeeeeeeee* shopping with Zimah will be crazy ;) kewl

The results didn't get me jumping up and down with joy.

But alhamdullillah i've passed. With a respectable grade.

Anyway, im gonna get off the pc now cos i have to get ready for tuition later in the evening.

-I'm missing you guys! Boo hoo...no more teh ais :(


Fin.

Hullo? Anybody there?

I know i havent been updating much. I've been busy. Yes...amidst all the chores.

I haven't really been watching tv. Only on weeknights do i get to catch up with my tv shows.

In the daytime its all chores.

Today has proved that i am kinda getting mixed up with all my schedules.

I've successfully gotten 2 tuition assignments and alhamdullillah, they're both in the north area (both ONE bus ride, save on my transport money hurhur)

I started on tuesday and i had another tuition session yesterday.

I THOUGHT i had another tuition session today in yishun.

I even ironed out all my clothes and my tudung and about 25 minutes ago, i checked my calendar and LO & BEHOLD

No tuition today.

Crap.

Oh well...

Back to watching Emil Emilda on youtube.

This and other pictures can be found

here.

the 3 lovely ladies *grins*

selamat "mengangkat sumpah" girls hehehe...

Fin.

Tagged.


Because everyone else seems to not want to "halo" me, i guess this is for the best.

People, pls scroll down the sidebar to make use of my tagboard okay??

So what have i been up to this past week.

I didn't really leave the house.

Although i did go to the pasar malam next to the yishun mrt station.

*i had a serious hankering for vadai* (p/s: it was REALLY good!)

What i've done this past week was:


1) do laundry (hanging & folding)

have i mentioned how much i HATE folding the clothes?


2) cook

3) clean the house, the room (and pretty much everything else that needs cleaning)

4) watch tv. (although i haven't gotten around to watch tv till it explodes, i'll make gd on my promise *winks to Nora*)

5) missing "someone" like crazy (NO, i haven't gotten over it yet.)

6)look for employment.

7) waiting for "THE" letter.


So yeah, that's most of it.

The good news is, i've already got 2 tuition assignments. *Yeay*

So that means some moolah so that's kinda pleasing to the pocket (esp. with the GST increase this SUNDAY)

Now that my grandmother is here for the weekend, i'll be accompanying her to her hospital and polyclinic appointments.

I can't wait to go to Sentosa next Monday! Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!


Fin.


*note to self: I am NOT going to the Christina Concert. Boo hoo. :( *

Just Beachy!

*hint hint* that was the bag for the day...it matches the theme for the day!

that's another hint. the contrast between the green and the blue, i just love it!

I love being home!

there's another OBVIOUS hint...it was still early so there weren't that many pple around. the guys in the background were skimming on the waves.

I went to the beach; with my girlies!

from left: Shahidah, Azimah & Zakiah

Below are the gerls setting up...

that was our lunch for the day: azimah's famed mac and chicken salad! its yummy and always a crowd pleaser :D

i call this pic...windswept

We played this by the beach...

Monopoly; the Uniquely Singapore Edition

that's my token, the Merlion

shahidah the trishaw, zak the singapura Cat, Azimah the one with the flashy car and thats me at the end.

getting into the swing of things...

All those are my properties. But even that didn't stop me from going BANKRUPT!

At the end of over 4 hours of play, i was declared bankrupt after landing on som very pricey property.

What caused my demise... landing on expensive property with FOUR houses on it!
I owed like $20 000+++

Azimah owned the MOST expensive properties with 4 houses on each of the Blue strips!

Even after mortgaging my property, i still couldn't cover the rent!

All in all, Azimah was made the rightful winner.

She wiped me out DRY.
You know the expression "kering kontang"?

That was EXACTLY it.


After a long day at the beach (the weather was really² good! and really² windy!)

We packed up and left for home at 5.30pm

I really enjoyed the trip. I was practically squealing when i got to the beach. :D

Even though i lost, i still ended up with a smile on my face.

*grin*

Fin.

Home Sweet Home (For Good!)

Reached home close to 9am this morning.

I'm exhausted.

The mental and physical exhaustion that is.

I'm finally home and i've more or less graduated.

Now to wait for the exam results.

Suddenly the 3rd of July seems sooooo long.

I want to say a heartfelt thanks to Nora especially for putting up with my hormonal urges (food-wise yah!) and my emotional moodswings.

Thanks for listening to me gripe.

Thanks for the2 most memorable sessions at Chili's! (and the Caramel Mocha Frappucino with Java Chip ---> skrg tgh mengidam White Choc Blended from Coffee Bean hohoho)

I still crave those southwestern eggrolls & mashed potatoes.

Kalau i pregnant one day and i crave those foods, matilah suami saya *harhar*

Ok, i've had enough of staring at the computer screen.

I'm going to take a nice Long HOT shower and SLEEP!

*yeay! i survived 3.5 years of cold showers. Back to my normal routine!*

Fin.

p/s: the papers went well alhamdullillah. I could actually do the arabic exam paper!

One for the road...


Just wanted to make another quick entry.

One more week here and i will officially be a graduate come 18th of June. (more like the 17th June after 11am. just to be precise haha.)

Thank you to all who have supported me through thick and thin.

If i have offended you in any way, please forgive me.

I don't think i'll be blogging until i get back to singapore that is.

2 more exams.


13th: Literary Theory and Criticism (3pm)

17th: Foreign Language for BENL (aka Arabic) (9am)


After that im home FREEE!


I plan to take the train back home.

It will be a solo journey.

Got lots of thinking to do.

*Although i probably think i will be thinking in my sleep*

Come the 18th i will be celebrating my new status with my family (and celebrating my cuzzin's 21st bday also)

Yahooo!

One more week.

This will undoubtedly be the LONGEST week of them all.

Pray for me k guys.


Hugs, love and kisses


Mary.


Fin.

My Word Of The Day...

Chili's (NOT k.a.n.t.o.i)

i love the decor and the menu too!

the look of pure concentration...

so many nice things to try....hmmm...should i try the monterey chicken

or should i try the country fried chicken???

this is the before pic.


this was ms. mourinho's

this was mine.

the chicken was fried perfectly. it was nice & tender.

the whipped potato was the best i've ever tasted in my whole entire life.

its creamy goodness would just send you to heaven and back again.

the corn.

oh. my. god.

no words can explain. i had never been a big fan of corn up until last friday.

the corn was steamed to perfection with the perfect blend of cajun spices and butter.

this was how the meal ended.

a perfect meal; with cherry on top.

which is why i looked so happy and content last friday evening.

thanks for the company ms. nore!

Chili's again when i come for clearance?

Yes please!

FIN.

p/s: more pics coming your way!

Dazed.


While this repeat of Satisfaction is playing, i just want to say:

I have 12 freaking days left here! Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

I know a lot of people will get upset after reading this.

No, i won't forget any of you InsyaAllah.

Its that sense of relief after doing this programme for 3 and a half years.

I am kinda getting burned out.

Which is why i am hitting the cinema before my exams with my ms. nore mourinho.

Shrek the 3rd will be awaiting us.

Lovely.

Then we'll hit Chili's and Starbucks.

We're preparing for sleepless nights after that. hahaha.

Must put in a LOT of effort for arabic.

If ONLY he smiled a lot more in class. *dreamy sigh*

unfortunately for US, he's married.

kalau tak kiter dua dah berMadu kan? *wink*


Alahhhh, lepas ni kiter dah takleh hang out hari-hari kat my room. Now that is a travesty.


On other fronts, im holding up well strangely enough.

I'm just worried about the aftermath that i have to deal with after the exams are over and i'll be home for good.

im having a 2nd case of tonsilitis. this time i had the sense to go and find out what was happening to me BEFORE it gets any worse.

And yes, the doctor did confirm that it was tonsilitis.

So at least im now on medication before i can't get anything down my oesophagus.

12 days.

I am so going to miss ALL of you here.

You all know who you are.

You have touched my life and made it a better experience here at uia.

No more late nights, no more soccer matches with the girls, no more ramadhan at uia.

and now that im heading home, its seems so surreal.

No one's on the other side waiting.

That's what hurts the most.


Fin.

Ironically...


the song i uploaded (katharine mcphee's over it), actually came before the actual incident.

hah.

how's that for spooky. did i predict this was going to happen on some subconcious level?

who knows?

Thank YOU for the concerned email.

I didn't want to tell you this happened becos of all the things i mentioned in the email.

Yes, my eyes are swollen.

A mixture of sleeplessness + crying + studying for my Arabic midterm.

Don't worry.

I've weathered worse things in life.

This is nothing.

I know i'll have the last laugh in the end.


That wasn't very nice of you to have said all those things to me. You're accusations are really unfair. But don't worry, i won't harbour any ill-feeling towards you


I really don't have time to deal with this.

I have an assignment due next week, a final exam next week as well and my final papers are in less than 2 weeks time.


Please God, give me the strength so that i can pull through this tough time. Amin.


This weekend's trip back home will be bittersweet.

My parents will be leaving for their umrah.

Something that struck me when my father mentioned this last saturday:


this pilgrimage ur mother and i are taking has many lessons which you can learn from. The most important lesson of all is that your parents won't always be around with you. This is the time that you learn to conduct yourselves with your brothers and sisters.


It rings true.

I'm going to miss them. A lot.

But i know that they'll pray for me when i have to take my final two papers.

I pray for your safe journey to the Holy Land, and your safe return to the arms of your family. Amin.


I LOVE YOU BOTH SO MUCH!


Fin.

Riddle me this...


Because the finality of it hurts me.

Because i keep feeling that this is so surreal.

But whatever happens, it happens for a reason.


Because we were not meant for each other.


Thanks for all those that rallied around me during this time of hardship

I admit the timing isn't great at all.

But at least i know that i'll emerge a stronger person.

Thank you once again.

I love you guys a lot.


Fin.

Bewildered.


That's the feeling of the moment.

This week has truly been a test.

It still is.

Till i rectify the problem i will still be feeling like this.

But it doesn't just affect me on THAT level, but its also got to do with something that will be happening tonight.

I love my friends here.

Nothing can change that.

They've seen me through all my crazy moments and helping me feel NOT so homesick.

I love you guys so much!

Tonight is my farewell (graduation programme).

Tonight i share the spotlight with my fellow compadres who have seen me from my 1st year.

The good, the bad and the ugly.

I remember going for my first farewell programme.

And i couldn't help but think: When is my turn coming?

Now that it is truly here, i really don't want to leave.

I remember initially having so much anxiety leaving home.

Compared to the rest in my batch, i felt that i was truly leaving my comfort zone because i literally knew NO ONE.

I was terrified.

To make things worse, i was the pioneer singaporean student taking the english degree programme at IIUM.

So when i entered my english classes, i was like a fish out of water.

I remember feeling like turning back and running through the door.

I left my home, i left ALL my friends and i left my comfort zone.

Everything i knew was back home.

And, to make things even MORE worse, I was the only one from my batch that was thrown to the hostel on the hill.

So i was literally an island by myself.

I am by nature a person who RESENTS change like the plague.

But as time flew by, and i got to know some people from my course, i felt much better.

Going to classes were no longer a chore.

Seeing familiar faces especially Firah (i owe u many, many thanks) made the time spent here much more bearable.

I. LOVE. Going to my lectures.

The lecturers i will definitely miss.

I am going to miss Mr. Colonial, Dr. Adrian Hare (the man that stumbled on my blog. Eeeekk!), Kak Mei, Kak TJ, Ms. Afifah, Dr. Subra, Dr. Faridah, Dr. Engku and all the other lecturers that taught me.

This was the learning journey that will last a lifetime and hopefully an ETERNITY.

So now that I'm graduating, change seems to loom its frightening face at me again on the horizon.

But i guess after being here, I'm confident that i will be able to fight the waves of nausea and anxiety (not forgetting tears) that will bring me to my next journey in life.

I am going to promise myself not to cry tonight.

But then, promises can sometimes be broken.

Especially in emotional times.

Must not forget to pack the tissues tonight.


So remember kids: Be careful for what you wish for because you might really get it and you'll be caught unaware.


So, today marks 26 more days of my undergraduate life here in IIUM.

This is not goodbye.

Merely farewell.

For all my family and friends, thanks for being supportive and always challenging me to do better.

I don't think i could have gotten through this without your love and support. Thanks.


Fin.

Its out in the open now.


No more hiding already.

She spilt it.

Honestly, she kept it in for quite a long time oredi.

She burst like a dam.

I read her like a book.

It doesnt just work the other way. It works both ways.

Right now, i feel terrified.

I feel like having the ground swallow me.

I'd be lying if i said i was okay.

I'm NOT.

I really am NOT.

im scared and sad.

sad to find out that everyone isn't behind me.

i know everyone wants what's best for me.

but really, i don't know whats happiness anymore.

i dunno whether its my happiness or its their happiness that i'm looking for.

no one's good enough for them i guess.

im afraid of losing my happiness.


Fin.