Mind Numbing.


How would YOU feel about sitting for 4 hours of English lectures (most of which i've heard before in my undergrad days)

After having to stomach 2 hours of a class on verb phrases.

And you wonder why i signed up for this torture right?


_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _



This is a public plea for help, anyone who took creative thinking classes in U*IA, pls kindly lend me your notes.

I have to come up with an Ed. Psych paper on creative thinking in the S*ingapore context.

Now THAT should be fun.


Fin.

Missing...


Aku kangen......


Fin.

Learning to Let Go.


One of the entries on my post on 25 Random Things on FB read:


I have increasingly been ridden with worry and high levels of anxiety of late.


Every night before i go to sleep, i end up worrying.

For a full 15-30mins.

Elizabeth Gilbert wrote in her book, Eat Pray Love, that she was one who had a monkey mind.

Meaning, she had thoughts that swung "from limb to limb". Swinging precariously and wildly without any discipline.

That's exactly what i experience just before i fall to sleep.

I can't seem to harness my thoughts and energies and tuck them aside for a good night's rest.

And when all these thoughts collate themselves, i end up feeling miserable. Like the swinging monkey, my thoughts and i fall from the heights and land in a pile of misery.

Thats when my Past crawls out from the deepest recesses of my mind to wreck havoc with my Present and my Future.

Making me feel like a worthless human being.

And sometimes when it gets really bad, i'll be drowning in a pool of tears before i drop off into a troubled slumber.

A friend said yesterday; "You've changed, quieter. You weren't like this last time."


I guess many things happened in the last 6 yrs to dramatically change my personality.

I know im just a shell now.

And im not who i used to be.

I'm just a memory of mySelf.


Fin.

I'm Yours - Jason Mraz


1. Put your music on shuffle.

2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.

3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS!

4. Tag 10 friends who might enjoy doing the memo as well as the person you got the memo from

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
IF SOMEONE SAYS "IS THIS OKAY" YOU SAY?
Happily Never After - BSB

WHAT WOULD BEST DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY?
Merpati - Hady Mirza

HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?
Leave out all the Rest - Linkin Park

WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?
For a Pessimist I'm Pretty Optimistic - Paramore (can i say so true???!!!)

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE?
Diva - Beyonce (Hell yeah!!!)

WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
Hero - Mariah Carey (how nice!)

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
With You - Chris Brown

WHAT IS 2+2?
Suddenly I See - KT Tunstall

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
Right Now - Danity Kane

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Music Box - Mariah Carey (hmmmmm)

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
Usah Lepaskan -Taufik Batisah (clearly i have issues)

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
Without You - Christina Aguilera

WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
Decode - Paramore (hahahahahaha...wat im THAT difficult to read meh?)

WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
Barenaked - Jennifer Love Hewitt (hahahahahahahahaha....whaaat!?)

WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Hold On - Take That

WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
Back In The Day - Christina Aguilera

WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
Rehab - Rihanna (more like therapy i think)

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
Too Little Too Late - JoJo

WHAT'S THE WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN?
Summertime - NKOTB ( but i LOVE the summer weather!)

WHAT MAKES YOU CRY?
Break The Ice - Britney Spears

WHAT MAKES YOU LAUGH?
Candyman - Christina Aguilera (heheeeee)

WHAT IS THE ONE THING YOU REGRET?
One Sweet Day - Mariah Carey feat Boys II Men

HOW WILL YOU DIE?
Always be My Baby - Mariah Carey (perhaps i'll be smothered)

WILL YOU EVER GET MARRIED?
Vision Of Love - Mariah Carey

WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
Ain't No Other Man - Christina Aguilera (or perhaps in this case WOman)

DOES ANYONE LIKE YOU?
Wall to Wall - Chris Brown (meaning to say i hv got lots of admirers? haha)

WHAT SCARES YOU THE MOST?
Bleeding Love - Leona Lewis (so true on so many levels)

IF YOU COULD GO BACK IN TIME, WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE?
Hallelujah! - Paramore

WHAT WOULD YOU SAY, WHEN YOU MEET YOUR BOSS?
4 minutes - Madonna feat. Jusin Timberlake (hahahaha!!!!!!)

WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS?
I'm Yours - Jason Mraz (auuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuwwwwwwwwwwww!!!!)

go ahead, have a go!


This post is open to anyone! Its fun!!! Try it!


Fin.

The Common Bond Of Friendship

Until recently, I turned a deaf ear but i see that there is no end to it.

So i need to say my peace here.

I REALLLLLY hope some of the juniors read this and even if they don't i'll post something up on ASSIIUM's yahoo grp.

But i just want to post this question to the seniors in ASSIIUM now.

Why the divisive-ness?

Why is there a need to segregate yourselves among the new and the old?

Is it something novel and that you're trying to send out some message to the newer ones?

These are just some of the questions that got me pondering.

I mean, for every action there is a reaction isn't it?

So why this action to divide yourselves?

What kind of reaction were you thinking of when you decided on this course of action?

One of the main aims of ASSIIUM was to create a shelter, a home away from home, a welfare agency if you must to take care of the needs of the Singaporean students.

But recently, there has been nothing of that sort.

Meaning?

Falling attendance rates at ASSIIUM programs.

A division between the EXCO and the members.

Now, all these are possibly assumptions but when it concurs with several different individuals, i think the evidence speaks for itself.

To the EXCO:

I am NOT telling you how to RUN the show.

I am telling you like it is.

This is what OTHER seniors have been hearing.

You need to get back in control!

Where is the Ukhuwwah that my seniors have tried to set as an example?

Where is the unity?

It does not show.

AT all.

I'm sorry but that's the ugly truth.

The sole reason we hold elections for EXCO posts is because we want the members to be free to choose their leaders.

Therefore, it is the EXCO's job to SERVE the ASSIIUM community and not the other way around!!!

They are the ones that got u there.

Serve them.

Not forgetting Listening!!!

Their needs.

Even if they THINK they don't need certain things.

Tht is the job of leaders.

To be forward in thought and to pre-empt any sort of problems and so forth.

YOU as the EXCO need to gain the trust of the community.

As for the newbies, the job does not JUST lie on the EXCO.

Show some respect will you?

And do more listening for God's sake.

They are doing things for YOUR own good.

EVEN if you think you DON'T need it.

I'm sick and tired of listening to all the bullshit and crap that has been going on all this while.

I hate to say it but the golden era of ASSIIUM is LOST.

Until you STOP your pettiness, you will NEVER enjoy your stay at I*IUM

After all, aren't your undergrad years meant to be the BEST times in your life

*it at least warrants a top 5!*

So how is it that your seniors (of all different batches and educational backgrounds) are ABLE to get together and be civil, not to mention downright friendly.

And the rest of you lot are just keeping in your own cliques.

Start LIVING outside your comfort zone pple!

The working world is gg to be MORE cruel and less sheltered than this!!!

Fin.

Will the Ceasefire remain?


This article will surely astound you.



"As the Arabs see the Jews"His Majesty King Abdullah,The American MagazineNovember, 1947



Summary

This fascinating essay, written by King Hussein’s grandfather King Abdullah, appeared in the United States six months before the 1948 Arab-Israeli War. In the article, King Abdullah disputes the mistaken view that Arab opposition to Zionism (and later the state of Israel) is because of longstanding religious or ethnic hatred. He notes that Jews and Muslims enjoyed a long history of peaceful coexistence in the Middle East, and that Jews have historically suffered far more at the hands of Christian Europe. Pointing to the tragedy of the holocaust that Jews suffered during World War II, the monarch asks why America and Europe are refusing to accept more than a token handful of Jewish immigrants and refugees. It is unfair, he argues, to make Palestine, which is innocent of anti-Semitism, pay for the crimes of Europe. King Abdullah also asks how Jews can claim a historic right to Palestine, when Arabs have been the overwhelming majority there for nearly 1300 uninterrupted years? The essay ends on an ominous note, warning of dire consequences if a peaceful solution cannot be found to protect the rights of the indigenous Arabs of Palestine.



"As the Arabs see the Jews"His Majesty King Abdullah,The American MagazineNovember, 1947
I am especially delighted to address an American audience, for the tragic problem of Palestine will never be solved without American understanding, American sympathy, American support.
So many billions of words have been written about Palestine—perhaps more than on any other subject in history—that I hesitate to add to them. Yet I am compelled to do so, for I am reluctantly convinced that the world in general, and America in particular, knows almost nothing of the true case for the Arabs.

We Arabs follow, perhaps far more than you think, the press of America. We are frankly disturbed to find that for every word printed on the Arab side, a thousand are printed on the Zionist side.

There are many reasons for this. You have many millions of Jewish citizens interested in this question. They are highly vocal and wise in the ways of publicity. There are few Arab citizens in America, and we are as yet unskilled in the technique of modern propaganda.

The results have been alarming for us. In your press we see a horrible caricature and are told it is our true portrait. In all justice, we cannot let this pass by default.

Our case is quite simple: For nearly 2,000 years Palestine has been almost 100 per cent Arab. It is still preponderantly Arab today, in spite of enormous Jewish immigration. But if this immigration continues we shall soon be outnumbered—a minority in our home.

Palestine is a small and very poor country, about the size of your state of Vermont. Its Arab population is only about 1,200,000. Already we have had forced on us, against our will, some 600,000 Zionist Jews. We are threatened with many hundreds of thousands more.

Our position is so simple and natural that we are amazed it should even be questioned. It is exactly the same position you in America take in regard to the unhappy European Jews. You are sorry for them, but you do not want them in your country.

We do not want them in ours, either. Not because they are Jews, but because they are foreigners. We would not want hundreds of thousands of foreigners in our country, be they Englishmen or Norwegians or Brazilians or whatever.

Think for a moment: In the last 25 years we have had one third of our entire population forced upon us. In America that would be the equivalent of 45,000,000 complete strangers admitted to your country, over your violent protest, since 1921. How would you have reacted to that?
Because of our perfectly natural dislike of being overwhelmed in our own homeland, we are called blind nationalists and heartless anti-Semites. This charge would be ludicrous were it not so dangerous.

No people on earth have been less "anti-Semitic" than the Arabs. The persecution of the Jews has been confined almost entirely to the Christian nations of the West. Jews, themselves, will admit that never since the Great Dispersion did Jews develop so freely and reach such importance as in Spain when it was an Arab possession. With very minor exceptions, Jews have lived for many centuries in the Middle East, in complete peace and friendliness with their Arab neighbours.

Damascus, Baghdad, Beirut and other Arab centres have always contained large and prosperous Jewish colonies. Until the Zionist invasion of Palestine began, these Jews received the most generous treatment—far, far better than in Christian Europe. Now, unhappily, for the first time in history, these Jews are beginning to feel the effects of Arab resistance to the Zionist assault. Most of them are as anxious as Arabs to stop it. Most of these Jews who have found happy homes among us resent, as we do, the coming of these strangers.

I was puzzled for a long time about the odd belief which apparently persists in America that Palestine has somehow "always been a Jewish land." Recently an American I talked to cleared up this mystery. He pointed out that the only things most Americans know about Palestine are what they read in the Bible. It was a Jewish land in those days, they reason, and they assume it has always remained so.

Nothing could be farther from the truth. It is absurd to reach so far back into the mists of history to argue about who should have Palestine today, and I apologise for it. Yet the Jews do this, and I must reply to their "historic claim." I wonder if the world has ever seen a stranger sight than a group of people seriously pretending to claim a land because their ancestors lived there some 2,000 years ago!

If you suggest that I am biased, I invite you to read any sound history of the period and verify the facts.

Such fragmentary records as we have indicate that the Jews were wandering nomads from Iraq who moved to southern Turkey, came south to Palestine, stayed there a short time, and then passed to Egypt, where they remained about 400 years. About 1300 BC (according to your calendar) they left Egypt and gradually conquered most—but not all—of the inhabitants of Palestine.

It is significant that the Philistines—not the Jews—gave their name to the country: "Palestine" is merely the Greek form of "Philistia."

Only once, during the empire of David and Solomon, did the Jews ever control nearly—but not all—the land which is today Palestine. This empire lasted only 70 years, ending in 926 BC. Only 250 years later the Kingdom of Judah had shrunk to a small province around Jerusalem, barely a quarter of modern Palestine.

In 63 BC the Jews were conquered by Roman Pompey, and never again had even the vestige of independence. The Roman Emperor Hadrian finally wiped them out about 135 AD. He utterly destroyed Jerusalem, rebuilt under another name, and for hundreds of years no Jew was permitted to enter it. A handful of Jews remained in Palestine but the vast majority were killed or scattered to other countries, in the Diaspora, or the Great Dispersion. From that time Palestine ceased to be a Jewish country, in any conceivable sense.

This was 1,815 years ago, and yet the Jews solemnly pretend they still own Palestine! If such fantasy were allowed, how the map of the world would dance about!

Italians might claim England, which the Romans held so long. England might claim France, "homeland" of the conquering Normans. And the French Normans might claim Norway, where their ancestors originated. And incidentally, we Arabs might claim Spain, which we held for 700 years.

Many Mexicans might claim Spain, "homeland" of their forefathers. They might even claim Texas, which was Mexican until 100 years ago. And suppose the American Indians claimed the "homeland" of which they were the sole, native, and ancient occupants until only some 450 years ago!

I am not being facetious. All these claims are just as valid—or just as fantastic—as the Jewish "historic connection" with Palestine. Most are more valid.

In any event, the great Moslem expansion about 650 AD finally settled things. It dominated Palestine completely. From that day on, Palestine was solidly Arabic in population, language, and religion. When British armies entered the country during the last war, they found 500,000 Arabs and only 65,000 Jews.

If solid, uninterrupted Arab occupation for nearly 1,300 years does not make a country "Arab", what does?

The Jews say, and rightly, that Palestine is the home of their religion. It is likewise the birthplace of Christianity, but would any Christian nation claim it on that account? In passing, let me say that the Christian Arabs—and there are many hundreds of thousands of them in the Arab World—are in absolute agreement with all other Arabs in opposing the Zionist invasion of Palestine.

May I also point out that Jerusalem is, after Mecca and Medina, the holiest place in Islam. In fact, in the early days of our religion, Moslems prayed toward Jerusalem instead of Mecca.
The Jewish "religious claim" to Palestine is as absurd as the "historic claim." The Holy Places, sacred to three great religions, must be open to all, the monopoly of none. Let us not confuse religion and politics.

We are told that we are inhumane and heartless because do not accept with open arms the perhaps 200,000 Jews in Europe who suffered so frightfully under Nazi cruelty, and who even now—almost three years after war’s end—still languish in cold, depressing camps.
Let me underline several facts. The unimaginable persecution of the Jews was not done by the Arabs: it was done by a Christian nation in the West. The war which ruined Europe and made it almost impossible for these Jews to rehabilitate themselves was fought by the Christian nations of the West. The rich and empty portions of the earth belong, not to the Arabs, but to the Christian nations of the West.

And yet, to ease their consciences, these Christian nations of the West are asking Palestine—a poor and tiny Moslem country of the East—to accept the entire burden. "We have hurt these people terribly," cries the West to the East. "Won’t you please take care of them for us?"
We find neither logic nor justice in this. Are we therefore "cruel and heartless nationalists"?
We are a generous people: we are proud that "Arab hospitality" is a phrase famous throughout the world. We are a humane people: no one was shocked more than we by the Hitlerite terror. No one pities the present plight of the desperate European Jews more than we.

But we say that Palestine has already sheltered 600,000 refugees. We believe that is enough to expect of us—even too much. We believe it is now the turn of the rest of the world to accept some of them.

I will be entirely frank with you. There is one thing the Arab world simply cannot understand. Of all the nations of the earth, America is most insistent that something be done for these suffering Jews of Europe. This feeling does credit to the humanity for which America is famous, and to that glorious inscription on your Statue of Liberty.

And yet this same America—the richest, greatest, most powerful nation the world has ever known—refuses to accept more than a token handful of these same Jews herself!
I hope you will not think I am being bitter about this. I have tried hard to understand that mysterious paradox, and I confess I cannot. Nor can any other Arab.

Perhaps you have been informed that "the Jews in Europe want to go to no other place except Palestine."

This myth is one of the greatest propaganda triumphs of the Jewish Agency for Palestine, the organisation which promotes with fanatic zeal the emigration to Palestine. It is a subtle half-truth, thus doubly dangerous.

The astounding truth is that nobody on earth really knows where these unfortunate Jews really want to go!

You would think that in so grave a problem, the American, British, and other authorities responsible for the European Jews would have made a very careful survey, probably by vote, to find out where each Jew actually wants to go. Amazingly enough this has never been done! The Jewish Agency has prevented it.

Some time ago the American Military Governor in Germany was asked at a press conference how he was so certain that all Jews there wanted to go to Palestine. His answer was simple: "My Jewish advisors tell me so." He admitted no poll had ever been made. Preparations were indeed begun for one, but the Jewish Agency stepped in to stop it.

The truth is that the Jews in German camps are now subjected to a Zionist pressure campaign which learned much from the Nazi terror. It is dangerous for a Jew to say that he would rather go to some other country, not Palestine. Such dissenters have been severely beaten, and worse.
Not long ago, in Palestine, nearly 1,000 Austrian Jews informed the international refugee organisation that they would like to go back to Austria, and plans were made to repatriate them.
The Jewish Agency heard of this, and exerted enough political pressure to stop it. It would be bad propaganda for Zionism if Jews began leaving Palestine. The nearly 1,000 Austrian are still there, against their will.

The fact is that most of the European Jews are Western in culture and outlook, entirely urban in experience and habits. They cannot really have their hearts set on becoming pioneers in the barren, arid, cramped land which is Palestine.

One thing, however, is undoubtedly true. As matters stand now, most refugee Jews in Europe would, indeed, vote for Palestine, simply because they know no other country will have them.
If you or I were given a choice between a near-prison camp for the rest of our lives—or Palestine—we would both choose Palestine, too.

But open up any other alternative to them—give them any other choice, and see what happens!
No poll, however, will be worth anything unless the nations of the earth are willing to open their doors—just a little—to the Jews. In other words, if in such a poll a Jew says he wants to go to Sweden, Sweden must be willing to accept him. If he votes for America, you must let him come in.

Any other kind of poll would be a farce. For the desperate Jew, this is no idle testing of opinion: this is a grave matter of life or death. Unless he is absolutely sure that his vote means something, he will always vote for Palestine, so as not to risk his bird in the hand for one in the bush.

In any event, Palestine can accept no more. The 65,000 Jews in Palestine in 1918 have jumped to 600,000 today. We Arabs have increased, too, but not by immigration. The Jews were then a mere 11 per cent of our population. Today they are one third of it.

The rate of increase has been terrifying. In a few more years—unless stopped now—it will overwhelm us, and we shall be an important minority in our own home.

Surely the rest of the wide world is rich enough and generous enough to find a place for 200,000 Jews—about one third the number that tiny, poor Palestine has already sheltered. For the rest of the world, it is hardly a drop in the bucket. For us it means national suicide.

We are sometimes told that since the Jews came to Palestine, the Arab standard of living has improved. This is a most complicated question. But let us even assume, for the argument, that it is true. We would rather be a bit poorer, and masters of our own home. Is this unnatural?
The sorry story of the so-called "Balfour Declaration," which started Zionist immigration into Palestine, is too complicated to repeat here in detail. It is grounded in broken promises to the Arabs—promises made in cold print which admit no denying.

We utterly deny its validity. We utterly deny the right of Great Britain to give away Arab land for a "national home" for an entirely foreign people.

Even the League of Nations sanction does not alter this. At the time, not a single Arab state was a member of the League. We were not allowed to say a word in our own defense.

I must point out, again in friendly frankness, that America was nearly as responsible as Britain for this Balfour Declaration. President Wilson approved it before it was issued, and the American Congress adopted it word for word in a joint resolution on 30th June, 1922.

In the 1920s, Arabs were annoyed and insulted by Zionist immigration, but not alarmed by it. It was steady, but fairly small, as even the Zionist founders thought it would remain. Indeed for some years, more Jews left Palestine than entered it—in 1927 almost twice as many.

But two new factors, entirely unforeseen by Britain or the League or America or the most fervent Zionist, arose in the early thirties to raise the immigration to undreamed heights. One was the World Depression; the second the rise of Hitler.

In 1932, the year before Hitler came to power, only 9,500 Jews came to Palestine. We did not welcome them, but we were not afraid that, at that rate, our solid Arab majority would ever be in danger.

But the next year—the year of Hitler—it jumped to 30,000! In 1934 it was 42,000! In 1935 it reached 61,000!

It was no longer the orderly arrival of idealist Zionists. Rather, all Europe was pouring its frightened Jews upon us. Then, at last, we, too, became frightened. We knew that unless this enormous influx stopped, we were, as Arabs, doomed in our Palestine homeland. And we have not changed our minds.

I have the impression that many Americans believe the trouble in Palestine is very remote from them, that America had little to do with it, and that your only interest now is that of a humane bystander.

I believe that you do not realise how directly you are, as a nation, responsible in general for the whole Zionist move and specifically for the present terrorism. I call this to your attention because I am certain that if you realise your responsibility you will act fairly to admit it and assume it.

Quite aside from official American support for the "National Home" of the Balfour Declaration, the Zionist settlements in Palestine would have been almost impossible, on anything like the current scale, without American money. This was contributed by American Jewry in an idealistic effort to help their fellows.

The motive was worthy: the result were disastrous. The contributions were by private individuals, but they were almost entirely Americans, and, as a nation, only America can answer for it.

The present catastrophe may be laid almost entirely at your door. Your government, almost alone in the world, is insisting on the immediate admission of 100,000 more Jews into Palestine—to be followed by countless additional ones. This will have the most frightful consequences in bloody chaos beyond anything ever hinted at in Palestine before.

It is your press and political leadership, almost alone in the world, who press this demand. It is almost entirely American money which hires or buys the "refugee ships" that steam illegally toward Palestine: American money which pays their crews. The illegal immigration from Europe is arranged by the Jewish Agency, supported almost entirely by American funds. It is American dollars which support the terrorists, which buy the bullets and pistols that kill British soldiers—your allies—and Arab citizens—your friends.

We in the Arab world were stunned to hear that you permit open advertisements in newspapers asking for money to finance these terrorists, to arm them openly and deliberately for murder. We could not believe this could really happen in the modern world. Now we must believe it: we have seen the advertisements with our own eyes.

I point out these things because nothing less than complete frankness will be of use. The crisis is too stark for mere polite vagueness which means nothing.

I have the most complete confidence in the fair-mindedness and generosity of the American public. We Arabs ask no favours. We ask only that you know the full truth, not half of it. We ask only that when you judge the Palestine question, you put yourselves in our place.

What would your answer be if some outside agency told you that you must accept in America many millions of utter strangers in your midst—enough to dominate your country—merely because they insisted on going to America, and because their forefathers had once lived there some 2,000 years ago?

Our answer is the same.

And what would be your action if, in spite of your refusal, this outside agency began forcing them on you?

Ours will be the same.



Read to know more.


Fin.

Super-Poked.


U know that FB application s*uperpoke?

Well, my mother has discovered that app and is super-poking me.

'Nuff said.


Fin.


p.s: there's just something "weird" about having ur parent being TOO wired these days.

I'm Soooo Proud!


I'm chuffed to say that im friends with my friend Ms. Nore.

Not only is she an amazing friend, *who undoubtedly saw me through my breakup phase - it was so ugly im lucky i didn't get thrown out of her room*

But she's an amazing student as well.

As her friend, i never failed to give her a lot of encouragement especially since she devotes a LOT of time studying.

More than I did at least.

And so this blog entry is just to say:


CONGRATULATIONS!

Congratulations on your success!

For being one of the TOP 5 BENL students!!!

(she's No. 2 to be exact!)

I'm so excited and ecstatic at the same time!


So when i go KL i wait for u to open table big-big hor, ok?


Hahahaha.

Love you and may success always follow in your footsteps!


xoxo,
M*ary


Fin.

Volunteer.


Anyone who's known me for quite some time knows that im not big on volunteering UNLESS necessary.

And i unwittingly volunteered to become the peer facilitator for G*esl.

Yah Zak, i VOLUNTEERED.

Gawd i feel like an arse now for doing it.

i have to be at the venue at 9am on a SATURDAY!!!

gaaah!

No sleeping in tomorrow.

Boohoo...(and i arrived home at 9.30pm today - thanks to G*esl of course)

What is G*esl?

Its an acronym for s/ervice l/earning something like voluntary work and CIP.

I guess it was a blessing in disguise having Leadership & Management as well as being in the ASSIIUM exco.


I hope i can contribute something worthy and make FULL use of this time in this module (that i really don't have a choice in)

Wish me luck.

Thank God that Almie will be there.

Again.

Azimah, thanks hor! I owe u many-many hehe.


But honestly i've GOT to find some new friends cos -no offence Almie- u're kinda cramping my style *me being single and all* haha.


Fin.

Status: Confused.


Oh no.

Not in terms of sexuality.

I'm straight.

Through and through.

Hahaha.

I'm more confused about wat Dr. F. said.


...dan Mary di Spore, juga sedang glamour.Tak lama nak kawin kan?...


sejak biler aku nak kawen?

Does she noe something i dont?

Hahaha!

Tp baguslah, ader org sentiasa doakan.

Amiin insyaAllah Dr. F dgn berkat doa Dr.


Today was a good day.

I arrived in sch a good half and hr before it started.

Managed to excuse myself for zuhr too before class started.

Alhamdullillah i've got a nice lecturer.

Sometimes im finding it a little hard to merge my secular and religious identities.

I feel...

CONFUSED at times.

I guess its a good learning experience for me.

I miss the blue tiled roofs.

And the people under the blue tiled roofs.

And i miss my AI girlies!

And i miss Huda cos i havent seen her in the LONGEST time.

Omg im such a terrible friend.


Fin.

Scatterbrained.


Its only the 1st day of class and i've already made many blunders

I brought the WRONG textbook to class.

I got LOST looking for my classroom (when i already looked at the map to ENSURE i knew exactly where i was supposed to be!)

I turned up a little late (2-3mins late for class)

-latecoming is VERY unbecoming of a teacher-


I had only realised that i brought the wrong text to class in the train ride to school.

I brought the yellow textbook instead of the blue one required for class today.

So, not wanting to make a bad impression of myself, i had planned to go to the library to go and get myself a textbook at the photocopy shop.

Alas, they had run out of copies (oh just as well, i already had the copy - im such a goody2 i know)

So because of my detour, i ended up being late for class thanks to my excellent mapreading skills.

Haiz.

So sian lah.

And to think that i arrived in school 15mins BEFORE class started.

What a way to start the semester.

Feel like a complete idiot.

Oh well, i can acquaint myself with the 2001 EL syllabus to cheer me up (NOT!)

Resolution for tomorrow:


Be a half an hour EARLY for class!!!!!!


Fin.

Solitude.


It can be fun sometimes.

But otherwise its just painful.

Plus the reminders of IT is just everywhere.

And there's no running away from it.

And every night...

Its really hard to go to bed.

To the point that i have to force myself NOT to cry.

The pillows have uncountable amounts of tearstains.

Even then...i just have to suck it up and MOVE on.

Like Tim Gunn says:


Make It Work.


And in essence, there is nothing else BUT to make it work.

With whatever i have left.

But I'm just tired.

I'm tired of the whole cycle.

I just can't go through it all over again.

Its painful and destructive and i don't have any idea whether i can pick myself up again the next time.


Fin.

Bye-Bye.


No.

I'm not bidding adieu to my blogging activities.

Just kissing farewell to my social life.

Or like Nora says: (which really is more exciting and sexy haha!)


No more making love to my social life.


This has only been DAY 3 of orientation week and we already have deadlines for assignments.

Yes you read me right.

DEADLINES.

Even before the classes begin.

-some classes begin 2nd March!-

Oh and the boys there.

I can possibly safely say that there are plenty to look at.

Just to ogle at.

BUT nothing more cos most of them are attached.

-drats!-

*there goes one of the resolutions out the window*

but seriously, is there really a need for some girls to stake claim of the guy right in front of my eyes.

She took one look at me and then suddenly went all over her boyfriend.

*like what the hell!?*

i merely glanced in their direction cos i saw my HOD of English frm Y*jc in campus.

i was completely annoyed by her behaviour.

grow up lah.

why so insecure anyway?

ok enough of the griping.

I'm not looking forward to tomorrow by the way.

Cos there's a lot of running around.

Running around without my floorball stick is EXTREMELY rare these days.

No.

I should rephrase that.

It is COMPLETELY EXTINCT!


So what else happened today besides that rude and unwelcome act i saw at the canteen today.

My English exemption test.

O-M-G!

It was horrifying and mortifying.

And i am the english major.

can you imagine the horrfied faces face that i encountered courtesy of the friendly volunteer on my right a.k.a Almie a.k.a. Azimah's boyfriend.

He's an engineering grad so u can imagine his horror.

Questions about noun and verb phrases and adverbial clauses came out. AND more.

And mind u its only 25 MCQ!!!

I could literally hear the sweat trickling in the lecture theatre.

Haha.

Almie lost it when i started to draw the phrase structure trees.

Hahaahaaaah.

Thats when he decided to throw in the towel and leave the lecture theatre early.

I had a tough time too.

Granted not as tough as it was for him but I still broke into a sweat.

Im not exactly a grammar freak as much as i enjoy correcting people.

So im just hoping for the best.

If not i'll have to resit for the grammar test on the 5th of March.

And the degree would have been in vain.

*bleargh*

Im not keeping my hopes up thats for sure.

Even the course coordinator mentioned that only 2% of the previous cohort were exempted.

So.

That's done and out of the way.

Now.

What the hell am i going to wear tomorrow!?


Fin.


p/s: anyone remember Ms W*ong the music teacher we had back in sec 1 and 2? She was spotted at campus today! *i had vivid flashbacks of the music lessons some 11 years ago! the horror!

And so it has begun...



I probably shouldn't mention this but i feel like being a little bit of a bimbo tonight.



I saw some cute guys today!


Operative word SAW!


No im not THAT bold ok. I am very shy.


Really.


Actually i only saw A cute guy


-not even SOME lah. just ONE haha-



Nothing else happened except that i got a private tour to RSIS at N*TU by Kak Faeza and the HSS library.


And i really must thank Kak Faeza because it was so WONDERFUL to see a familiar face at N*tu.


Did i mention that there is something rather clinical about the buildings there?


It feels rather dreary and i really miss being able to walk frm one faculty to another cos N*tu is HEYUGE!


And thats only N*tu not N*ie.


Earlier today *at freakin' 8.30am!* i was at N*tu for my briefings.


Yeahlah. I have to leave the house at 6.30am if not i'll be late!


And have i mentioned how much i DETEST travelling to school.


Morning journey on the train is not very desirable.


And i cant sleep.


Even if i get a seat on the train.



Ok i DIGRESS.


I meant to mention that as my first act as a student again, i borrowed books from the HSS library.


I HAD to cos i have an exemption test to sit for this wednesday at 10am. Must study so that i will NOT have to take some modules.


*bleargh*


so i had to look for the "introduction to language" text again to REFRESH my memory.


Hey its been wat?


5 years since i last SAW that book.


Tomorrow is a new day.


And i can't wait to get this week over with already.


i LOOOOVVVEEEE school though.


I think i might have looked so well adjusted that even someone came up to me to ask me whether school had just started.


Tomorrow will be a LOOONG day.


Gd night.



Fin.



p/s: they are SO selekeh in their dressing. u*ia was a fashion parade EVERYDAY. oh God i miss that place so much my heart ached with so much longing today!

2009...already?


I think the year sped by a little too fast.

Too fast for my liking.

But then again it cant all be for my liking right?

I've done a couple of new things this year.


1) Like getting a job.

2) Switching into my preferred profession.

3) Ushered in 2008 by pulling an all-nighter at Tampines West CC.

-i guess that explains why im at home this year. and no i have NO desire to repeat it again this year-

4) i learned how to scuba! DEFINITELY one of the highlights of 2008.

5) i learned to appreciate my friendships even more! Thank you my AI girlies, my Chantiques and the group of Seniors. I love u and heart you so much.

6) i learnt to love and let go.

And last of all, i learnt that i didnt really achieve all my resolutions for 2008.

So come 2009 (in abt 2hrs) i will NOT set any resolutions for myself.

I'll just take it as it comes or make it up as i go along.

Whatever i feel like doing.

No pressure.


2009 is going to mark a major milestone for me i think.

I'll be a quarter of a century come APRIL...APRIL ok! *sweats anxiously*

Im NOT ready.

Im just NOT ready.

And Zak is going to tie the knot next December!

Alhamdullillah.


I'm not ready to handle 2009.

At all.

Not like how i embraced 2008.

With so much zest and optimism.

Cos somewhere in my heart of hearts...

I feel hopelessness just settling in.

And making herself comfortable.


Oh well.

Lets see how things shape up.


Fin.

Because it has been bugging me for the past few days!


Twilight the movie was utter crap!

Yes and i will say it again.

It was RUBBISH!


I think the critics have gone blind, deaf and retarded.

They're lucky the screenplay is good (though the storyline was SHITE)

Yes.

I honestly cannot believe i subjected myself to 2.5hours of sheer crap.

In the freezing cold mind u.

Im SO glad on one hand that i didnt spend any money on the tix.


HOWEVER!


I just wasted a perfectly good free movie pass.


So i decided to reserve my scathing comments of the movie cos probably the story got lost in the screenplay.

But no!

The book was pretty much crap too.

And i wasted $50 bucks on the rest of the books.

*Yeah, stupid me got "conned" into buying the book thanks to the sister* So annoyingggg!

I thought it was just the first book.

The 2nd book started to look up though, then the ending was a bit nonsensical.

And the 3rd book was just RUBBISH.

I was howling more with laughter at the ABSURDITY of the plot.

The complete insanity at her consistent RAMBLING.

Why!?

And this part i REAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLY don't get...


HOW CAN SHE EVEN GET GOOD REVIEWS FOR ALL HER BOOKS!!!


I havent read a book this bad in such a LOOOONNNG time so u can imagine the outburst.

Can you really blame me?

I have been exposed to better books my entire existence.

Emma by Jane Austen is freakin awesome next to the whole Twilight series.

The DaVinci Code movie was so much better than that movie.

And i didnt even LIKE the movie!

Dan Brown, J.K. Rowling, Jhumpa Lahiri...you all rock my socks.

S*tephenie M*eyer...really...wat creative writing class did u take?

I'm amazed ANY publishing house wanted to publish u at all.

Much less make a movie out of it.

Okay...enough of the scathing review.

*58&^%$(*&(&%%#347678*(&^(&*&()*&_)(&_)*%$#*


Fin.

Bali - Day 2

I just wanted to upload some photos of day two but i forgot that i didnt take that many in the first place.

So here goes...

We woke up for subuh then went back to bed cos subuh in Bali is at 4.45am!!!

Not to mention we had a reaaaaaaaaaaaaaaalllllllllllyyyyyyyyyyyyy loong day previously.

We were up playing Pictionary till abt 1.30am.

Seri and myself went back to our room at the end of the hall.

Yes, it was very CRUEL.

They separated the four of us! Not even an adjoining room was available.

The moment we reached our room, Seri crashed out mere minutes of her head touching the pillow.

I had been having problems sleeping a few days before the trip which still carried on when i was there.

So while Seri was sleeping peacefully, i still took about 15-30mins before settling in which was close to 2am.

After the short respite we had, we woke for breakfast *in all our kopet glory*

We got to the breakfast table ard 8am and had a hearty meal for our upcoming journey for the rest of the day.

It was a good thing that we packed in a big breakfast cos we didn't have lunch till about 3-4pm later that afternoon.

After the heavy meal, the four of us took a walk along the sidewalk towards the nearest supermarket to get some essentials.

It took a good 10-15mins to and from the shop, back to the hotel to shower and get dressed for our fun filled water activity day.

We had agreed to meet Rudy our guide at ard 9.45am at the hotel lobby to head over to Tanjong Benoa with another family flying in from S*ingapore (however they were I*ndian Nationals).

We waited for quite a while cos they were stuck in traffic and then they also too a GREAT long while to check in.

Why is it that when THEY *see above* go ANYWHERE in the world, they are PAINFULLY slow.

To the point of leisurely-ness!

Even our tour guide commented so!

-Well that's another gripe for another day-

Ouh well.

Onward with the story.

We all piled into the van for another 45min journey to Tg Benoa and all the 4 of us managed to get 40 winks.

The moment i opened my eyes we were less than 5 mins frm our destination.

We were greeted by a very tanned Balinese man who gave us a menu of sea sport activities with a brief description.

*Side-note: We had initially just wanted to snorkel and look at the pretty fish from a glass bottom boat*

But LO & BEHOLD! the moment the words "SCUBA-DIVE" escaped his lips, we all looked at each other in silent agreement that this was OUR choice!

I could hardly believe it!

For 400,000 Rp we would be diving amongst the colourful sealife for half-an-hour with our diving instructor!

400,000Rp is roughly equivalent to SGD54!

Not only that!

We also took up the video and photo package for another 120,00Rp.

Though some may argue that it is a little pricey (or not), it was definitely $$$ well spent.

I could not have been happier and excited to dive.

I had only been snorkelling both in M*alaysia and once previously in B*ali and i looked forward to this amazing experience EXCITEDLY with my girlfriends from Uni!

It was DEFINITELY the 2nd highlight of the trip.

The 1st being suli's "not-so-secret-admirer" at Uluwatu, Mr Kumis with his hand around her shoulder and his head leaning on the other unoccupied shoulder

LMAO!

I still roll with laughter at the memory :))

Ok back to our diving experience.

We werent the only pple diving that day, the mother and father from the Indian family that joined us too.

So it was a cosy company of 6 plus the 2 very nice diving instructors, Arjun and Dicky and the guy steering his boat and his son *i think*

We took a less than 10min boat ride to the dive site.

We were told that it was abt 3-5m deep.

Before we began the actual diving, our main instructor Arjun gave us some simple instructions on how to use the mask and the regulator and how to breathe using the regulator.

You THINK its easy but its not.

I was lucky enough to have snorkelled which gave me a leg up on the use of the regulator

The 3 girls weren't so lucky.

We were also taught some basic hand signals and what to do in case water came into the regulator and mask.

After the short lesson, we were strapped with weight belts and one by one, we plunged into the slightly chilly waters.

First in was shasha.

Taking the cue from her, we all grabbed the side of the boat *clinging for dear life mind you! especially when there are weights strapped around your waist*

They then put on the tank on when we were in the water.

Suli and Seri were quite nervous, seeing that they had no swimming experience.

Both had trouble breathing from the regulator.

Shasha and Suli were then led to the dive site by the instructor.

Seri and I were next into the water.

I didnt want to leave Seri alone but Dicky had already pulled me to the dive site seeing that i had already gotten a hang of breathing on the regulator.

Before i could even allay Seri's fears he whisked me away to the dive site and let me equalise as we went deeper.

Then i met the other 2 girls on this piece of coral and i waved excitedly to shasha and suli!

There were PLENTY of fish swimming around us.

I saw some parrot fish, i think it was angel fish and then "Dory's" too

But i did feel slightly claustrophobic and worried that some of the fish would bite my fingers.

It was a spectacular show of God's creation.

Ok im tired now Part 2 of Day 2 later.

-4 tired and hungry girls after a dive-

Fin.

p/s: i want my OWN e*dward c*ullen; NOT R*obert P*attinson. movie disappointed me :(

and so i bought the book.

Bali - Day One

I think i put off writing about my trip with the girls long enough.
I think there are many who are anxiously awaiting.

And tonight i've finally decided to blog.

Breaking the silence finally.

*ok more of recovering from the exhaustion hehe*

We departed frm Singapore at 7.20am.

I had to wake up at 4.am.



That in itself was a miracle.


Seri's mom sent us off at the airport.



It was nice to have at least one parent around. It felt really good!



We checked in our bags and salam-ed Seri's mom and waved goodbye and started our adventure.



When we made our way into the transit area, Shasha kept asking:




"Eh korang, betul eh kiter nak gi Bali!?"








Yeah, we were excited.




Even myself!



When we stepped into the plane, we were like, "this is it! we're heading to Bali together!"



It was awesome.



Taking off in the singapore sunrise made it even MORE beautiful!






About 2.5hours later, we landed safely in Ngurah Rai welcomed by a slightly overcast sky and a little showering rain.


But nevertheless, it was still perfect! :D



We were greeted by our guide Rudy and made our way to Grand Istana Rama, Kuta, Bali.





On the way there we did a little chatting and made plans for the afternoon to head over to Uluwatu for a little culture.

Upon reaching the hotel, the rooms weren't ready yet so we took off on foot to explore the area.



I thought we were extremely adventurous for 4 young ladies exploring new territory.



Haha, i felt so grown-up!



We happened to stumble upon this little alley with LOTS of goodies.






There were sunglasses, hats, shirts, dresses, maxi dresses, accessories, books...you name it!


I was EXHAUSTED just looking at all the gorgeous things on display!



I felt like buying them all but held back knowing it was ONLY the first day.



I only wanted to get a pair of shades, which i did eventually after a whole load of searching.



But i finally succumbed and bought a pair of leather sandals too hehe.



It was around 11-12pm and i think and we were there for a good 1.5hours.



In the SWELTERING heat and humidity (thanks to the showers earlier on)







We talked a bit to one of the shopkeepers, who happens to be muslim, md harris is his name, and directed us to the nearest McDonalds which was CERTIFIED halal.



After lunch we headed back to the hotel and checked in and rested a while before heading out again at 4pm to Uluwatu.


The fun began here.



Hehe...the kechak was beautiful!


*there were also CUTE guys around!*





I loved the way they used their voices throughout the WHOLE 1 hr show!



And how they used the chorus to re-create scenes from the Ramayana.

Quite like the Greek chorus *and so was the setting!*




It was beautiful.



The first time i was in Uluwatu, it was sooo breathtaking.




It still WAS for the 2nd time round!

I loved it so much!

After the show, we got to take pictures with the cast, and suffice to say, Suli had an admirer!

Hhhahahahahahahahah ROFL!

It was hilarious!

I wish i could put up pictures but i'll let the lady of the hour do the honours.



We then made our way for dinner at Rumah Makan Minang Sederhana.


The Kalamansi juice was POWEEERRRRRRful i tell u.

So refreshing.

And of course i had the Teh Botol as well.

No trip to indonesia is complete without Teh Botol!



We then made our way back to the hotel but requested to stop at Kuta Centre to shop at the Matahari departmental store.

Of course, we shopped AGAIN!

This time for souvenirs for friends and families.

Yes families.

Not just one family but MORE than one hehe.

We shopped right up till closing time and then left to window shop at B*illabong, R*OXY and many more shops.

I think we finally reached the hotel at 11pm.

By then we were TOO tired but still!

we managed to slot in PICTIONARY!

It was soooooooooo much fun!

And hilarious!

Trying to guess the words from the pictures was the BESTest part. We were rolling with laughter!

The player of the night definitely had to be Seri.

And the word of the night was: courgette *bleargh!* i had a hard time explaining that one.

She's really good at the game.

Next time we partner up again k Seri *winks*

Finally after an exhaustive day, we called it a night while MORE adventures awaited us the next day :))

Fin.

Goodnyte and Hullo Denpasar!


I will be in Denpasar in 10 hrs time!

My return trip in less than 6 mths!

With my gerlfrens no less!!!

I pray that we will have a safe journey there and back.

Adventures await us!

Oh Allah, pls keep me and my friends safe.

Ameen.


Pictures when i get back.

Meanwhile, all my Eidul Adha pics in Facebook

Enjoy!


Fin.

Uber Tired.


I arrived home around 9 last night.

It was a WONDERFUL journey home without the boys.

Just my sister and myself plus the parental units.

I really enjoyed my weekend at my kampung.

It was different and quite hectic.

Just looking at my grandparents pottering whizzing around doing their chores is enough to knock the wind right out of me.

Plus, it was a Raya weekend so things got busy the MOMENT i stepped into the compound.

I swept the dead and dried leaves frm the backyard.

Hung out the clothes to dry.

Learnt how to make LEMANG!

There were sooo many things to do.

Plus there was the cow to sacrifice on Eid'ulAdha itself.

3 dishes materialized after the sacrifice.

Daging masak lemak, sup daging AND daging masak kicap.

I think i overdosed on red meat that day itself.

Thankfully there was NO cooking involved the next day.

Lunch was sponsored by my Uncle George and my Maklong at Pizza Hut *thank you!*

And we also went to our tailor in Seremban to make our baju raya for NEXT raya.

I know its a little early but really, its the best way to beat the crowds and you wont get shoddy work.

I just finished doing the laundry from our trip back to the kampung and NOW i have to pack again.

I feel like im living out of a suitcase these days.

I have a mental checklist right now.

But i havent gotten down to packing yet.

I havent even decided WHAT luggage i'm gg to bring.


Ooooh, i just checked the payslip and alhamdullillah a healthy bonus!

Will be able to set aside some xtra savings!

*Plus satisfy my shopping craving*


Fin.

Specially for the Bali Babes


Seeing that i have to 'balik kampung' for Eidul Adha here's a list of things that you MUST bring.


Needless to say: Passport (make sure ur passport has at least 6mths validity if not u can still get an extension for ur passport tomorow)

Your trolley bag should be locked with a belt that goes around the bag.
It prevents THEFT and ensures that you wont be embarassed if ur bag decides to vomit the contents out.

U shld keep all intimates and clothes in a BIG travel zip lock bag (available at HomeFix or any DIY store). This prevents any damage to your clothes due to spillage of any cosmetics/shower gels while travelling and saves u the embarrasment if airport security decides to check your luggage.

IF you have a bright ribbon, tie it at the handles so that u can spot it when it comes out of baggage clearance because 90% of the time, all luggage looks the same. This is especially true when u're back at the arrival hall in singapore.

Roll your clothes! It saves a LOT of space.

We'll need sandals and if necessary, bring a pair of flip flops. Avoid shoes!

Keep all your chargers in a zip lock bag too!

Ensure that you have enough space in your luggage for the return trip. Especially your souvenirs! Heheh. *Garuda has a baggage limit of 20kg*

Bring a collapsible/foldup bag that u can bring along when shopping so you go green at the same time! *This is VERY handy*


And before you start packing, come up with a checklist so it will save you a lot of time and trouble!

Happy packing and Eid Mubarak in advance!


Fin.

And YOUR plans for the weekend are?


Its been a really bz week.

I spent the whole day out with my parents, youngest brother and two male cousins yesterday at W*ild W*ild W*et.

Needless to say i'm knackered.

And NO i did not swim because the RED flag is up.

BUT i did catch some cute looking lifeguards!

Yummmm.

Hahaha...i am such a shameless hussy.

And no there are no photos.

Are u kidding me? Singapore is too small. haha.

Im NOT going to risk it.

After the wet afternoon, we headed over to my aunt's place (the 2 cousins house) so that rest of them could perform their prayers.

Later after maghrib, we went BOWLING!

Did i mention i went bowling last week and the week before that?

At least i can say now that i don't suck as much.

So what else will i be doing for the weekend?

I'm going to BALIK KAMPUNG!

This time with my whole family and my Maklong and her husband.

Hopefully my two youngest cousins will be joining us.

We are gg to slaughter a cow in the backyard.

Now THAT should be REAALLLY interesting.

I'll be leaving tomorrow night.

All the way till tuesday.

And then i will immediately start packing for Bali!

Yeayness!

Eight more days!

Can't wait to go with you girls!


Fin.

10 Things I Hate About You Moment.


You know the part where Julia Stiles starts screaming up and down when she got her acceptance to Sarah Lawrence?

And she screams:


I GOT IN! I GOT IN!


Well that's exactly how i'm feeling!

Yeahhooo!!! I'm in the January intake!

I just sent in some documents earlier today and i had this moment of clarity.

Like its all coming true!

My plans took a long detour

A 7 year detour to be exact.

But thats the way it has all unfolded.

And i'm really happy that im finally at this point in my life.

At one point i really thought i was going to become a doctor.

Really.

Like a real medical doctor specialising in Gynaecology

But then when i started getting crap maths results i knew it really wasnt a calling.

And then teaching came along.

It was an exciting prospect.

I guess the reason why i was such a big suck up to my teachers was because i really appreciated how much they did for me.


sans one teacher who i STILL despise & loathe until today.


I guess i realised this early on.

And i think it helped in my choice of profession.

To some, a job is just a job but i think there's much more to it.

Have you ever just sat down and pondered WHAT you were going to do with your life?

What YOUR contribution to society would be?


Okay maybe im a freak having thought about that at age 16


But really, it helped.

I know some people are going through a transition in their lives at the moment.

I think the ONLY thing you will be happy doing would be to do something you were so called, pre-programmed to do.

Sometimes the job you ARE doing MIGHT be the thing that you were meant to do.

Its not an easy path for anyone.

It comes as a realisation as some might say.

So take your time.

Think carefully about it.

Like what they say,


If you enjoy what you do, you'll never work a day in your life.


Fin.

Hello My Lovelies!


Time check: 1250am.

I have NO idea why im still up.

Today i went a little nuts.

My sister thinks im nesting.

Cos i baked a whole batch of cookies at 9pm just now.

Haha.

I really must be crazy...

Ok, my eyes are starting to get REAALLLLY droopy.

Gd nyte.


Fin.

Crud.


Upon hearing the news that civil servants pay were to be cut,

I couldn't help but feel sad.

I mean who wouldn't?

As a first time fully employed person, who wouldn't look forward to a nice bonus at the end of the year right?

Not to mention the fact that the pay is linked to the govt's GDP.

But i guess, it is a taste of things to come.

For ALL of us.

Next year is going to be a tough one.

I. MUST. CURB. MY. SPENDING!

When in doubt, always go back to Suze Orman's rules.

If you don't have the money, DON'T spend it.

But there really is something that I should always give thanks for.

Syukur alhamdullillah that i am EMPLOYED.


Neways, i just finished cooking a whole pot of spaghetti sauce.

Yummyyy!

I smell like sauce right now.

And i do have the urge to bake.

Don't ask me why.

When i start to cook, i BINGE.

Pardon me while i wash off this saucy smell.


Fin.

Food Journal.


I thought it would be a great idea to chronicle the next few days with my cooking expedition.

And i wish i had pictures of the past two days that i've "slaved" over the hot stove.

Yesterday was mee siam goreng.

Not bad for a first attempt.

Today was nasi Lemak.

Complete with the sambal and the fish and telur and ikan bilis.

Yes i made a whole pot of rice (ok 2 1/4cups of rice)

And its all GONE!

Yes.

The rice has magically vanished!

My dad had one serving.

So did my sister. -which is RARE by the way-

I think my 3rd sibling had a serving and one for myself at lunch.

And Adam had a GRAND total of THREE helpings!!!

I'm only left with the pandan leaves and the ginger in the rice pot.

So tonight i am going to get a headstart for tomorrow's meal.

Which is spaghetti!

It is very much the family favourite.

My mom's been trying to copy the recipe but she hasn't managed to master it haha.

So i shall begin the browning of the minced meat and the sauce.

Which really isnt that hard to do.

And wat is the secret ingredient?


Of course im not telling! Hahaha


I can't wait for my day out with Umi tomorrow!


Fin.

Cooking Expedition


I am currently mother-less.

Only for a week because she has to escort a small grp of kids from her school for an IT Camp in Subang Jaya

So it is MY responsibility to cook the meals for my family (plus do the heaps and mounds of laundry and other housework) on top of having to go to school.

Bleargh.

The cooking i don't mind.

But laundry for 5 people is really not my thing.

And my dad told me that i should try and expand my cooking repertoire as my mom has reminded that WE should not be eating out so often since she's away for the moment.

So today i tried cooking something OUTSIDE my comfort zone.

No sphagetti bolognaise, no lasagne, no nasi goreng *i hear u sniggering Kha!*

So i tried making fried mee siam.

You must be clenching your stomach, laughing so hard to see that i can't cook such a simple dish.

I just don't do well with food that has a myriad of spices and tastes.

Asian cooking -minus chinese food that is- is REALLY challenging.

I took a while to master sambal tumis.

I CAN cook mee hongkong and laksa goreng.

But really, mee siam goreng is quite a feat.

So i succeeded to make the dish with minimal effort and a very good recipe i knicked off the net.

Not too shabby i must say.

No complaints from both my brothers so that's well done.

Haha.

So what's next?

I guess its nasi lemak tomorrow.

Now i seriously need a nap!

I've been up since 6am (on a Sunday!) to send my mom off at the airport!!

My eyes are soo heavy.

Toodles.

Fin.

Life's Little Surprises.


Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're gonna get.


Tom Hanks in Forrest Gump.


Some of us are still reeling with shock and utter surprise.

I know i am.

Hahaha!

The jaws that went agape after we were all told.

It is God's will and i congratulate her on her happy news!

May you be granted good health and wealth and get to experience married life soon insyaAllah amiin!

Have i also mentioned that i will no longer teach on a contract basis but as a permanent staffer?

Yes i just got the news last friday :)

I am now waiting to enter N*IE, hopefully in January.

This is after 3 failed attempts to enter the service.

And i am a year behind the projected date that i planned.

Again.

I can plan as much as i want and execute it but it still is up to the Almighty to decide.

So i need to be patient.

And just try my best.


Oh Allah, please grant me the patience to accept the things that i CANNOT change.


Amiin.


Fin.

Feeling Possessed...


Yeah by Facebook.

Completely possessed.

I can understand why N*eil H*umphreys wrote that column about his addictiveness to Facebook.


That aside...


I've been browsing around.

And i am ashamed!

Ashamed that i've left this blog neglected.

Neglected because sometimes i wish i were more insightful in my entries rather than just spew verbal vomit.

*although it can be therapeutic at times*

I always wanted to become a journalist.

Joining the ranks of lets say, C*hristian A*manpour.

So i MUST make an effort to at least add in some commentary about life.

Insightful commentary.

I must not let my emotions get in the way of a piece that i might be writing.

I'm struggling to be a writer.

And not JUST a reader.


Fin.

Wedding Weekend

To Abg Saiful Jedi:

Tahniah on getting hitched!

I am soooo happy for you!

Both of you looked sooo berseri-seri :D

*unfortunately i have not much pics cos my digicam DIED on me*

But before it DID eventually die on me, i did get some photos.

Namely Kak Mariah a.k.a Kak Yaya and her lovely baby boy Muhd Ilhan!

-Kak Yaya still looking gorgeous-

I'm so glad i stayed on.

-Abg Saiful's sister *ex-Ma'arifian also sanding on the same day*-

-which helps explain why Kak CT was there with me-

Oh and i did get a little surprise.

I bumped into the EX.

He was also there on Abg Saiful's invitation.

It might seem weird but i felt serene.

No sadness, no unhappiness.

Zip.

There was just serenity.

I'm glad we both parted on good terms and still remain friends.

Alhamdullillah.

Enjoy the rest of your week!

Fin.

In Transit.


I guess it had to happen sooner or later.

But it was okay.

I'm okay.

That's the most impt thing.


We were just two trains that happened to stop at the same station.

And now its time for him to continue his journey.

I'm still in transit.

Yup. I guess thats it.

I'm still in transit.

Cos i don't know where i'm gg.


YET.


Fin.

Suze Ormon says...


that you should NOT spend what you do NOT have.

Which means....


Maryam, you are NOT going to Rihanna's concert!


Mental check; you are gg to Bali next month!

If only i earned oodles and oodles of money like THAT $2mil. man.


Fin.

Have a BLOODY good time!




Ok all good citizens.



Do your part and show YOUR support at the FIRST-EVER blogger blood donation drive in Singapore!



I am a regular blood donor and there's really nothing to it!



You just lie there and let the good nurses take care of you! :)



*pssssst*


- you get free food after you donate your blood!-


And there are so many other freebies


(that i DON'T normally get on a normal blood donation drive)


Like: a LIMITED EDITION t-shirt!


And!


a CERTIFICATE of participation.


Now how COOL is that?




Take it from me, its the easiest way to do a good deed.


*blood you donate could easily help THREE people!*





I'm going.



Are you?



See you there!!!




For more info: go to this microsite and to find out if you're my TYPE, go here!



Fin.

Selfish?



I just typed out a whole entry -and subsequently erased it-


Re-read it and it answers my own question.


Yes i think im being too demanding and selfish.


I hate me for being this way.


I don't like who i've become.


I'm just trying to come to terms with that piece of news that you handed me.



Fin.





p/s: I don't know how to tell my parents. I feel like such a disappointment. I failed. Again.

An Ode to YOU.


You; who thinks you are so righteous.

You; who thinks that everything you say or do is right.

You; who thinks that it is alright to just say anything.

You; who does not THINK before she speaks.



For all the things you've said, have you ever considered that you hurt so many people?

"I think I have every right to comment since its f*acebook" you say.

So why do you take offence at what other pple say to you?

You speak your mind about others, well i'll say what other pple *myself included* say about you.

It is my personal, VIRTUAL, space after all.

And hey, you said its ok.


10 Things pple HATE -yes hate- about you:



1)you are CALLOUS.

2)you are NOT tactful. *at all!*

3) you are abrasive.

4) therefore you rub a lot of pple the wrong way.

5) you pretend like you're a matyr

6) your words are the COMPLETE opposite of how you portray yourself.

7) YOU have NO compassion towards others.

8)you apologise but then repeat the mistake almost IMMEDIATELY.

9) you moan and groan about yourself and expect pple to PITY you.

10) and we suspect that you begrudge other pple for no obvious reason.



Try mirroring your words to yourself.

Sound out the words before you even type them.

Think how that person would feel even if YOU think your comment is harmless.



And about that "you look like Chucky's bride...the muslim version"

hey, thats ok.

I was dressing up for Halloween.

Maybe next year i'll be Jason.

*so i'll get to SAW your head off*



Hey you should have seen this coming for miles.

Bring it on.




p/s: to think that you even work in the social services line. i'm surprised that you don't have people skills at all. is it any wonder why so many people did not agree with you when you held leadership posts? think about it.


Fin.


p/p/s: I think i've watched an episode too many of G*ossip G*irl

I'm Not So Strong Anymore.



Then:


Wrong people; wrong time.


Now:


Right person, wrong time.



I am really exhausted.


I'm truly not that strong anymore.


I have been weakened by all the previous blows.


But i shall perservere.


And i shall trudge on.


Solo or not.



I leave it in the hands of Allah.



Please hear my prayer.



Fin.